Confusion

I had started working (internship)
I had started to think a lot about us
I don't want to be what mum said
but sometimes I kept feel is only me fighting for our love.
I'm very tired.
but I knew I love him.
Love him to the extend I don't want him to be far from me,
Love him to the extend that I willing to buy a shirt which is over my budget.
Love him to the extend that I will cry whenever he can't come.
Love him to the extend that will wait at the window.
Love him til get gastric just to wait to eat together.
I'm tired.
I knew he love me too.
But does he know what is he doing?
Nowadays he will keep bad mood and show temper.
Is this karma?
Why my heart like so doubtful?
I'm so damn worry I will change.
I'm not prepare to lose him and I don't want to lose him.
But why my heart so tired?
Sigh~~

Love him til I wanna marry him..
Love him more than I love myself
Just love him for everything...
He finds me though he tired
He disappoints me many times but if I wait he will appear.
My heart feel very pain
Because of my immature, he becomes very tired
because of my childishness, he has to be patient
because of me, he work like slave
because of me, he does thgs he doesnt want to
how can I not love him?
how can I live without him?
I can't accept if one day we no longer together
I can't accept if one day I have to lose him!!!
I'm selfish I know, but I love him.
I just want him to be mine, I'm just afraid of losing him...